[River Of Dreams]
"Oh, God!"
Excerpts from the original "Conversations With God"...

[River Of Dreams]

Jerry: How come you've got such a...I mean, just a voice....like everybody's?

God: Empathy; I'm talking to you in a way you can accept. I'm relating. I don't like to brag, but if I appeared to you just as God - how I really am - what I really am - your mind couldn't grasp it.


God: Even non-believers want what they've got down here to work.

Jerry: Well, have you read the papers lately? It ain't workin'!

God: That's why I came - to tell everybody I set the world up so it can work. Only it's up to you. You can't look to me to do it for you.


Jerry: People are always praying to you. Do you listen?

God: I can't help hearing. I don't always listen.

Jerry: Then you don't care!

God: Of course I care. I care plenty. But what can I do?

Jerry: What can you do? But, you're God!

God: Only for the big picture. I don't get into details.

Jerry: Then whatever happens to us...

God: Happens!

Jerry: You mean there's no plan, no scheme to guide our destinies?

God: A lot of it is luck.

Jerry: You don't control our lives?

God: I gave you a world and everything in it. It's all up to you.

Jerry: But we need help!

God: That's why I gave you each other.

Jerry: With your powers you could solve so many problems. Why don't you? Solve all our problems? Work a few miracles?

God: I don't do miracles. They're too flashy. And they upset the natural balance.

I'm not sure how this whole miracle business started, the idea that anything connected with me has to be a miracle. Personally, I'm sorry that it did - makes the distance between us even greater.


Jerry: If you're so involved with us, how can you permit all the suffering that goes on in the world?

God: How can I permit the suffering? I don't permit the suffering. You do - "free will". All the choices are your's.

Jerry: Choices? What choices?

God: You can love each other, cherish and nurture each other, or you can kill each other.


Jerry: Well, you know everything!

God: I only know what is. Also, I'm very big on what was. On what isn't yet, I haven't a clue.... Absolutely I can tell the future - the minute it becomes the past. I said everything could work out - if that's everybody's choice. People have to decide on their own what's to be done with the world. I can't make a personal decision for everybody.


Jerry: Which of the world's religions is the closet to the divine truth?

God: The divine truth is not in a building or a book or a story.. Put down that the heart is the temple wherein all truth resides.


Jerry: No offense, but I don't believe the Red Sea and I don't believe "six days to create the world".

God: You're right.

Jerry: I am?

God: Tell ya the honest truth, I thought about it for five days and did the whole job in one. I'm really best under pressure.

Jerry: One day to create the world?

God:And the sun; I hate to work in the dark.


Jerry: Is Jesus Christ the son of God?

God: Jesus was my son. Buddha was my son. Mohammed, Moses, you, the man who said there was no room at the inn, was my son.


Jerry: Will there be a judgement day for man?

God: Well, if they mean a doomsday, an end of the world thing, I'm certainly not going to get into that. But if you want my personal opinion, I wouldn't look forward to it. Be a lot of yelling and screaming, and I don't need that anymore than you do.


Jerry: What is the meaning of man's existence?

God: Life is like a glass of tea.....nah, nah... I better not go for laughs.

You know, Voltaire may have had me pegged right? He said I was a comedian who was playing to an audience that was afraid to laugh.

But seriously, put down that man and woman-persons, their existence means exactly and precisely not more, not one tiny bit less, just what they think it means and what I think doesn't count at all.

Jerry: That's very profound.

God: Sometimes I get lucky.


Jerry: Why have you chosen to appear at this time?

God: I wanna say to everyone that everything around them that they can see and smell and feel and hear, they should delight in all this, that what is here are some of my very best ideas. And I want everyone to try very hard to make sure it doesn't all go down the drain.

Why is it so hard for you to believe?

Is my physical existence any more improbable than your own?

I know how hard it is in these times to have faith. But maybe if you could have the faith to start with, maybe the times would change. You could change them. Think about it. Try. And try not to hurt hurt each other. There's been enough of that. It really gets in the way.

I'm a God of very few words - however hopeless, helpless, mixed up and scary it all gets, it can work. You find it hard to believe in me - maybe it would help you to know that I believe in you.

MOVIE: "OH, GOD!" (1977)
[River Of Dreams]God (George Burns) comes to a supermarket manager (John Denver) and tells him to spread the word. Folks have a hard time believing and the manager must face a judge in order to vindicate himself. God shows up in the courtroom and lends a hand. Academy Award Nominations: Best (Adapted) Screenplay.

[River Of Dreams]